Postpartum Party

Eloise and I partied so hard last night. She was binge drinking and crying; I was trashing our room, throwing nursing pads, pacifiers and swaddle blankets around like I didn't even care where they landed. This morning after we'd slept it off a bit I was like, "E, that was great. I haven't raged like that since college." I kept thinking how bad I feel for housekeeping particularly considering that housekeeping is primarily me.

There was a reason for her complete insanity and, not surprisingly, I was complicit. During the pediatrics rounds at the hospital, the doctor noted that Eloise had a tongue tie. She recommended that we have it snipped to prevent potential breastfeeding and speech issues in the future. Reasoning that since we'd circumcised Henry that we should do something to similarly torture our daughter - female circumcision being fairly uniformly frowned upon in these parts - we decided to go for it. The ENT performing the procedure told us that some babies are unphased and others a bit fussy. We fell into Category C: hell hath no fury like a baby with her frenulum clipped. In her solid week of life, Eloise has been easy peasy with the exception of yesterday and last night. This morning she seems to be resting comfortably and as such, my guilt is subsiding.

Moving onto observations and witticisms...

1. You can love 2 children at the same time. A few of you may have mentioned something to this effect. It is ridiculously true. I fawn over her the way I gush over Henry. Crazy true love all over again. Plus, watching my husband cradle a newborn makes me just about die a sudden hormonal death each time so I'm triple in love.

2. It is not possible for a 22 month old to grasp the arrival of a new sibling, no matter how obese you might get. Thus, his world will be rocked. Henry splits his emotional time between adoring Eloise - asking to snuggle and hold her, showing us her nose, asking her to come play in his "tunnel" (play teepee) - and having complete nervous breakdowns over unspecified tragedies. The good news is that every day, the ratio of loving, playful Henry to clinically insane Henry slides to the former's favor. We are also gradually getting better at focusing solely on him rather than feeling like we're constantly in a game of kid triage. Newborns are pretty low maintenance. Typically they can stare at a ceiling fan while they wait for attention.

3. There is no easy way to extract a fully grown baby from one's body. Day 1 post c-section I was asking if the hospital had a post-natal kickboxing class I could join. Adrenaline for the win! Day 2, I was moaning and begging for illegal drugs. Subsequent days are better and better but I can say, equivocally, that recovering from a c-section is a motherfucker. But then I remember recovering from vaginal birth and that was a total bitch as well. Suffering is a woman's lot in life, or something like that. I would like there to be a c-section recovery forum somewhere where I can post things like "is this shit normal?" But I think I'll have to suck it up and discuss with the many women in my life who have been sliced and diced.

Photos were requested and so photos you shall have. Our hospital has a contract with a professional photography company that busts into your room and sells you charming photos of your new baby. Last time, they came the morning after I'd labored for 30 hours, pushed for 4 hours, and had a kid vacuumed out of me. Henry and I looked rough. No photos purchased. This time we had an extra day. There were showers involved and small amounts of sleep. We suckered up and bought those pics. Here are a few.