This embryo is incredibly consistent. From 199.3 to 367, another doubling time of just under 55 hours. Again, it's not the 48 hours my clinic would like to see but I'm still within the 48-72 hour zone. Enough math. I am satisfied. Clearly I wanted them to call with a beta number somewhere in the ballpark of a billion but I am happy to be steadily increasing. I have decided - with no science to back me up - that the consistency of my rising HCG levels is a positive sign.
A different nurse called me this time. She was less gloomy and far more encouraging. She assured me I was still "in the game." That said, given that I didn't perfectly double, she asked me to come for a freaking fourth beta. I asked if I had to and she said "no." So, I'm not. I think three betas gives them plenty of data to play with. These repeated blood tests are making me so anxiety ridden that I'm failing to rock the serene maternal glow that I had this past weekend. I want to get back there. That was awesome.
So, next step is an ultrasound next week. It will put me at 5 weeks 4 days. Part of me would like to wait for 6.5 weeks so that I could get a better sense of what was going on - heartbeat, measurement, etc. I don't know. I'm gun shy. Last time things looked good at my 5.5 week ultrasound (well, except for the horribly low betas and the excessive bleeding) and then shit fell apart at the 6.5 week ultrasound. Perhaps I'm trying to spare myself the roller coaster. Perhaps I should just accept that I'm already clearly on the ride.
(I am addicted to metaphors. And parentheses. There are far too many of both those things throughout this blog. But I like them and find them useful.)
IVF ladies, did you have your first ultrasound at 5.5 or 6.5 weeks? Just curious.
Lastly, I saw my therapist today. Yes, I go to a therapist. And an acupuncturist. And a RESOLVE group. And I have a blog. I also text and email my friends 40 times a day. It takes a motherfucking village. She talked to me about "graduating" to a normal OB. This was such as happy thing to talk about and made me feel so joyful. Life as a normal uterus would be wondeful.